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There Once Was A Bill In The Statehouse...




From 13th Floor reader William comes this groan-inducing bit of legislation introduced in the Minnesota House in January.

It establishes a poet laureate for the state, but -- get this, everybody!! -- the bill is written in rhyming couplets*!!  Wacky!!  Irreverent!!

Seriously, it's kinda cute. But I think the bill's authors (does "laureate" rhyme with "great"?) should probably keep their day jobs.

Section 1. [138.99] POET LAUREATE.
1.6      Subdivision 1. Appointment.

1.7 The Gov' shall appoint a state poet laureate,

1.8  Who shall serve for a four-year term.

1.9 Because this appointment will always be great,

1.10 There's no need for the Senate to confirm.

1.11 In appointing a poet for the public good,

1.12 And to ensure there's no unjust omission,

1.13 The governor shall consider, if he would

1.14 Thoughts of the Humanities Commission.

The rest of the subsections stanzas, after the jump.

*Update: I just realized these aren't rhyming couplets at all. It's an octave with an ABAB rhyming scheme. My junior-year English teacher would kill me!  Sorry, Mrs. Sawyer!

1.15    Subd. 2. Removal.

1.16 The poet will be free to write rhyming lines, 1.17 With removal only for cause, 1.18 But we trust that the bard will promptly resign, 1.19 If the verse reads as badly as laws.

1.20    Subd. 3. Compensation.

1.21 'Twould be fair to provide some just recompense 1.22 As reward for the poet's tribulations, 1.23 But because at this time we haven't the cents 1.24 We're afraid there is no compensation. 1.25 But we ask as the poet travels the state, 1.26 And the people their ears they lend, 2.1 That our learned Commission take the position 2.2 To provide the poor poet a stipend.

2.3    Subd. 4. Gifts and grants.

2.4 To provide the support that needs to come 2.5 To support our new laureate, 2.6 Gifts and grants received of a generous sum, 2.7 We hereby appropriate.


 


Zach Patton

Zach Patton -- Executive Editor. Zach has written about a range of topics, including social policy issues and urban planning and design. Originally from Tennessee, he joined GOVERNING as a staff writer in 2004. He received the 2011 Jesse H. Neal Award for Outstanding Journalism

E-mail: zpatton@governing.com
Twitter: @governing

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